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LIVING IN DENMARK

Five ways to make a good impression at a Danish home

If you get invited to a Danish home for the first time, there are a few small ways you can leave a positive impression.

Five ways to make a good impression at a Danish home
Photo: Jonas Allert on Unsplash

Although house invitations have been a little sparser, that’s probably the more reason to make the most of them when the opportunity comes along.

Besides, once Denmark (and everywhere else) gets to the other side of the Covid-19 pandemic, it will feel nice to be as considerate as possible on the many social occasions that will hopefully come our way.

Here are few small ways you can make a good impression as a Danish house guest.

Get there on time

Whether it’s a birthday celebration, konfirmation, Easter lunch, family get together or university reunion, Danes tend to arrive punctually. This is not the case in all cultures, so it’s worth aiming for the exact time you’ve been told the occasion starts, rather than interpreting too much leeway.

If you arrive ten minutes too early or too late you should be fine, but anything more than that will probably need some degree of declaring undskyld (sorry) to smooth over any awkwardness.

Bring a gift?

This one doesn’t apply to all occasions, but if it’s a birthday, for example, you should bring a present – just showing up is not considered a gift in and of itself.

The present doesn’t have to be expensive or a huge gesture – feel free to judge this on the nature of your relationship to the person who is being celebrated. But by bringing a gift – no matter how token – you are effectively thanking them for inviting you.

If you’re going to a more general gathering that is not a celebration of a particular person, you don’t need to worry so much about a present.

Eye contact

When glasses are raised and it’s time to say skål (cheers), do your best to look into everyone’s eyes, one person at a time. Making eye contact when toasting is an important way to be polite and show engagement with the situation.

Thank them for the food

The phrase tak for mad (literally, ‘thanks for the food’) is ubiquitous at the end of all Danish mealtimes, whether mundane or celebratory. But if you’re a guest at someone’s house for the first time, thanking them for the food is essential if you want to come across as thoughtful and polite.

Make sure you wait until everyone has completely finished eating before you say thanks. If you say it too soon, and people are still drinking their coffee or finishing their cake, it might seem like you’re in a hurry to get away. If you say tak for mad at the beginning of the meal, everyone will just think you’re a bit strange (I did this once having been brought up to say thanks as soon as food is served). Saying tak for mad is only appropriate once everyone is finished and about to leave the table.

If this seems like a tricky etiquette to follow, don’t worry – everyone is going to say tak for mad at some point, so you can just wait until someone else sets off the chorus and then join in.

Offer to help with the dishes

Danish culture is quite egalitarian and there’s no harm in asking the host if you can help with the dishes or where you should take your plates once the meal is done.

You might notice other guests take their dirty crockery and silverware out to the kitchen with them as they leave the table – if so, feel free to follow their example.

Although your offer to help with the dishes will likely be turned down, it will probably be appreciated and you certainly won’t be imposing.

Did you find these tips useful? Did we miss any? Are there any similar topics you’d like to hear about? Let us know.

READ ALSO: Here’s what I learned after two years living like a Dane

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LIVING IN DENMARK

‘Cheaper’,’amazing nature’, ‘reliable transport’: The best Copenhagen commuter towns

Finding somewhere affordable to live in Denmark's capital is not easy, which is why a lot of people consider moving out of the city to rent or buy. The Local readers gave us an insight into life in a commuter town.

'Cheaper','amazing nature', 'reliable transport': The best Copenhagen commuter towns

With the increase in flexible working, more people are looking to smaller towns outside of Copenhagen to either work from home or commute from. Here are some of the popular commuter towns.

Kokkedal/Fredensborg (north of Copenhagen)

From our reader survey, Kokkedal/Fredensborg were the most popular areas people lived.

“We can have a big house with a garden for the kids compared to a small flat in Copenhagen,” one reader said. 

“Houses are affordable for North Zealand compared to Lyngby, Birkerød or Holte for example,” added Judy, another reader. “Not a lot of apartments or rentals available though.”

She said she loved the “amazing nature” of the area, as well as the safety, community spirit and fact it was close to amenities and Hillerød.

The commute however is not the quickest of the commuter towns.

“On the days I work in town it costs 52kr each way, I need to get a bus or walk to Kokkedal then the train and then a bus or walk to work so it takes up to 1.5 hours,” said one reader. 

Judy agreed that it normally took her an hour and a half to get to Copenhagen’s central station. She said that the “cost can be reduced by using a pendelkort and there is a tax deduction for long distance commutes.” However another reader in the area said it took them 30 minutes to get to Copenhagen central.

The worst part about living in the area, Judy said, was that “local trains and buses only run once an hour on weekends”.

“If you don’t have a car, it’s a pain.”

Another reader complained that “the restaurant scene is not great” and that the “general access to culture” was limited, although the Louisiana Art Gallery, they said, was “not far away”. 

What Judy loved about the area was “amazing nature. Safety. Close to amenities. Community spirit. Houses are more affordable than similar areas like Birkerød. Three stops from Hillerød station. by train. There are also buses to towns on the kystbanen line.”

Kokkedal station. Photo: Wikimedia Commons

The north of Copenhagen is a popular choice for commuters, due to the area’s many beaches and the good train links to the centre of Copenhagen.

Other popular commuter towns are Hillerød, Holte, Bikerød, Rungsted and Hørsholm. 

Vedbæk (north of Copenhagen)

A few kilometres south of Kokkedal but still north of Copenhagen, Vedbæk, reported our reader Ron, offers “small town life” where “nearly everyone knows each other”.

The wealthy coastal town, he said, “has everything we need, with easy train access to the Copenhagen on the Regionaltog.” In addition, the commute is “very reliable”, taking only 20 minutes on the train to Nørreport.

The downside, he said, was that housing in the area was very expensive. “It’s probably even more expensive in Vedbæk than in Copenhagen!”

The coastal town of Vedbæk is perfect for commuting. Photo: Tobias Kobborg/Ritzau Scanpix

Stenløse (west of Copenhagen)

To the west of Copenhagen, in Stenløse, housing costs are “much much lower” than the capital, according to one reader. They liked the “house prices, quiet, facilities, nature” and fact it was “still close to the city (36 minutes by train to go to Copenhagen Central).”

However they pointed out there are “only a few restaurants” and “a car is somewhat important.” 

The reader mostly worked from home but their commute involved cycling to the station then taking the S-tog to Copenhagen central station and another bike ride of a few minutes. “It takes about 40 minutes. Train is pretty reliable and runs every 10 minutes during the weekdays,” the reader said.

Other popular commuter areas in the west include Roskilde, Ringsted and Slagelse.

Køge (south of Copenhagen)

To the south of Copenhagen and on the coast, Køge was described by a reader as “quieter” and “cleaner” than Copenhagen, with no real negatives. 

“It’s a lot cheaper. I pay around 3,000 kroner for a single room student accommodation – two of my friends that live in Copenhagen pay 7,000 kroner a month – for a student apartment smaller than mine!” the reader said.

Their commute is “30 – 50 minutes depending on transportation mode (S-tog and regionaltog) – it costs around 650 kr a month with Ungdomskort.”

Dragør is another favourite to the south of Copenhagen due to its old-town charm.

The view across the straits to Nykobing Falster. Photo: Hubertus45/Wikimedia Commons

Nykøbing F (southern Denmark)

Nykøbing F, as it’s known, is a city on the island of Falster in southern Denmark, next to Lolland. Despite being further afield, Matthew found his commute “easy and reasonable” and house prices “much less” than in Copenhagen. He found the area he lives “peaceful” and “beautiful” with nothing he doesn’t like.

Odense (Fyn)

As the third largest city in Denmark, on the island of Fyn, Odense may feel far from Copenhagen. But reader Adrian said his commute to Copenhagen by train took “just over an hour. In a quiet carriage it’s relaxing and a great place to get work done.”

Adrian said house prices in Odense were at least half the cost of those in Copenhagen. “Cheaper housing, easy parking everywhere. Odense is a city with a small town vibe,” he said. The only minor point he said was the “lack of ‘cool’ cafes compared to Copenhagen.”

It’s says something about transport in Denmark that commuting from a different island 300km away can take the same time as commuting from a village just 40km north of Copenhagen. 

Some commuters even travel from Malmö in Sweden, taking advantage of the the fast train over the Øresund Bridge.

Do you have experience of living in a Copenhagen commuter town or village? We’re still interested in collecting readers’ experience of the different options. So if you want to contribute, please fill in the form below: 

 

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