Read news from:
Austria
SHARE
COPY LINK
For members

READER INSIGHTS

Reader’s story: How I slowly fell in love with the Swedish language

What makes a person want to learn Swedish? The Local's reader Sunny Das tries to answer a question that's bigger than quantifiable goals.

Published: 21 March 2024 14:31 CET
Updated: 11 April 2024 09:59 CEST
Reader's story: How I slowly fell in love with the Swedish language
Sunny Das is grateful that he was allowed to learn Swedish in his own time. Photo: Ola Ericson/imagebank.sweden.se

It was a dark and cold October day as I found myself standing outside Arlanda Airport.

It had been a long journey from Singapore to Stockholm in the midst of the Covid-19 pandemic. The first thing I noticed was that most of the pandemic restrictions that applied to people in the rest of the world were not as strict in Sweden. I looked like a real stranger with my face mask on.

But, somewhere in my heart something stirred, and my soul felt a little joy after seeing some form of normality. The taxi driver said something that sounded like “hey” in English, and so I responded in English. Then we started driving towards the centre of Stockholm.

Within 45 minutes, I was in Gamla Stan, and it was already evening. I was tired, but I won’t forget what I felt when I saw the beauty of the city. When the lights sparkled on the water, it was like poetry composing itself.

In the hotel lobby, I heard Swedish being spoken among people, and it was like music to my ears. It had been a long time since I learned a new language, but there was something melodic in the Swedish language that truly captivated me from the beginning.

This article was written by The Local’s reader Sunny Das. Photo: Private

Because there is freedom in Swedish society, it is easy to fall in love with something.

None of the Swedes I met said that I had to learn Swedish to survive in Sweden. As a result, I explored the language in my own way, and slowly fell in love with it.

Of course, attitudes towards language requirements have changed nowadays, but I’m grateful that it wasn’t like that when I started learning Swedish. It could have been very demotivating for me if someone had tried to force the language on me.

Instead, I had the opportunity to enjoy Swedish music, books and the culture in general. There was a song that inspired me to develop my Swedish and delve deeper into my language journey. The song was called Vem tänder stjärnorna by Eva Dahlgren (“Who lights the stars?”). What a beautiful song, just amazing. Evighet (eternity) is my favourite word in Swedish, which I learned from that song.

What is my goal with the Swedish language? A really good question.

But is there a goal in just watching the sunset with your dog on the beach? Or to dim the lights at three in the morning, closing your eyes and listening to “The Midnight” or “The Paper Kites”? Is there a goal when you share “Dad jokes” with your friends on a taco Friday night?

Many people learn French, Japanese or Italian to experience the culture and follow their hearts. I can say that there is no quantifiable goal but to enjoy the language journey, and sometime in the future, I can articulate my thoughts properly in a proper way in the Swedish language.

Yes, indeed, I’m still learning Swedish. There are certain situations when I can’t understand anything or find the right words from my limited vocabulary to explain something. But I’m trying, like many of us who are learning Swedish and love the language.

My grammar is wrong in various ways, and my pronunciation is flawed, and there have been several occasions when Swedish speakers have switched to English, perhaps out of sympathy or sometimes with a bit of a rude attitude.

I can only ask everyone who speaks Swedish not to discourage us but rather to help us learn this beautiful language instead.

Indian by origin, Sunny Das moved to Sweden in October 2020 and works as a software developer. The article was originally published in Swedish and translated to English by The Local. Would you like to share your Swedish story with The Local? Email our editorial team at [email protected] and we’ll get back to you if it’s something we’re able to publish.

Member comments

  1. I once had a sweet, tell me that when an immigrant from Africa tries to speak, Swedish, people are very proud of his effort. But when people from America, try to speak, Swedish, we just laugh at them. I am only comfortable using my Swedish with small children.

  2. I live in the USA. My experience has been encouragement but impatience with trying converse in Swedish with me. I write in Swedish more fluidly than I speak.
    Our granddaughters have started learning Swedish as well. My oldest lives with us and her best friend is named Svea. When I met Sveas father I asked, “Kan du svenska?” he said, “Na, I went to British school. Swedish is a useless language, that is why we all learn English.” Maybe English is more “useful”, but I find Swedish captivating.

Log in here to leave a comment.
Become a Member to leave a comment.

READER INSIGHTS

‘We all cheer each other on’: How we made friends in Sweden

Sweden is often rated as a difficult country to make friends in. We asked those who've been there, done that – or in other words, The Local's readers – how they met their closest friends in Sweden.

Published: 26 April 2024 10:43 CEST
'We all cheer each other on': How we made friends in Sweden

“They are so supportive, caring and understanding,” said Erin Swoverland, a reader from the US, about her friends. “We all listen, lift each other up and cheer each other on. I feel so incredibly lucky to have such amazing women in my corner.”

She met most of them at a gym in Stockholm. 

“I attended a Friday training class for women and the rest is history. I will say I think it being a small, independent gym made all the difference as we actually spoke to each other. I haven’t had the same interactions at larger chains,” she said.

Erin was one of dozens of readers who responded to The Local’s question about how they found their friends in Sweden, sparked by a recent survey which showed that 13 percent of foreigners lack a close friend (double the number of Swedes who said the same thing).

A lot of readers alluded to the part-truth, part-stereotype that Swedes tend to compartmentalise their lives and prefer organised fun over spontaneous activities, and one of the classic strategies that always comes up in these discussions is to join some kind of club or society.

The benefit of “organised fun” is that Sweden has a vibrant föreningsliv (literally “association life”), with many people involved in for example their local football club, gaming hub, gardening society, trade union, hiking club, or even just being on the board of their housing association.

“As I always liked cycling, running, badminton, indoor climbing and a few other sports, I found groups on Meetup for such activities. This helped me meet like-minded people. Soon afterwards, some of us started to hang out together for beers or pizzas etc. Thanks to these people we started to invite other people to our gatherings. Finally today, I have a large network of very interesting and close friends (immigrants as well as Swedish friends). When I look back, I realise that it was much easier to get to know people in events having just six to eight people. If you go in a large group setting it is difficult to meet people as splinter groups start getting formed,” said a Pakistani reader.

“I have been in Sweden for over 15 years now. During this time our close friendship network has just increased. Like any friends, we fight and argue at times, but at the same time I know that my friends care about me. I feel at home in Sweden with this circle of friends.”

He wasn’t the only one who suggested joining a society (although one reader cautioned against “survivorship bias” and pointed out that not everyone manages to turn up at event and immediately make friends). Even if you don’t join a traditional club, readers recommended plenty of other networking opportunities, including sites or friendship apps such as Meetup, Bumble BFF, Panion and GoFrendly.

Nathan Lloyd, a Welshman in Malmö, recommends networking meetups, even if they’re not directly relevant to your own field, as well as Facebook groups. He met his best friend, Brian, via Grindr – not the only one we’ve heard of who made platonic friends on dating apps.

“He’s truly my best friend. Been friends for over six years,” he said. “We enjoy loppising together, going out in nature, birdwatching and art, a major thing we bonded over. He’s been there through highs and lows and helped me in emergency situations when I’ve needed someone.”

Nathan Lloyd, centre, with his friend, Brian, and partner, Tom, at the Konstrundan art weekend in southern Sweden. Photo: Private

Not being afraid of putting yourself out there and making the first move was another tip that came up in the survey, with many describing Swedes as warm friends – perhaps even surprisingly warm – once you break through the shell.

“First and foremost, don’t try too hard. Best friends are the organic ones that come in your life at the moments you don’t expect. Be open and give a shot to those who seem to be more open. Swedes who have been abroad frequently are exceptionally more pleasant to keep around,” said Hadi from Iran, who first moved to Sweden in 2010 and now lives in the south of the country.

OPINION:

Peter, a reader who works at Lund University in southern Sweden, befriended his new neighbour after knocking on their door to ask if he could use their wifi until he managed to get his own.

“We have been very good friends ever since, even after I moved to another town. I find Swedes to be very friendly in general, but sometimes I need to make the first effort,” he said.

Robert Blomstrand, a born Swede who lived most of his life abroad, says he and his South African wife, Vanessa, met amazing friends in church and were surprised by their warmth and care.

“Through this we learned Swedish and had many wonderful Swedish experiences (sailing, meals, celebrations). Still very good friends,” he said.

Robert Blomstrand’s friends on a sailing trip to the Gothenburg archipelago. Photo: Private

Ioannis, based in southern Stockholm, said he met most of his friends through university or work and then made sure that the friendships were maintained after studies finished or work changed.

“Important first step was to accept that it is me, the one that has to make an effort. Then show interest in others, learn about who they are and how they are like. Share experiences with them, also offer help and support and ask for help and support. Independence and individualism can be an obstacle in creating social bonds. Make the effort, without expecting same returns. Give it time.”

“I believe that if you want a friend, you have to be a friend first,” said Jeremiah from the US. “My friends are people who were willing to invest in a building a relationship because they didn’t have them locally. We connected over the shared experience of being displaced and learning how to adult again. The connections grew because we had other shared interests, were willing to spend more time together, and were willing to help each other.”

“Focus on finding people who like doing things that you enjoy, like going to museums, movies, etc,” said a Stockholm-based reader, who made friends with his colleague after inviting him to a drag show at the Abba Museum.

“It’s so much easier to make friends during the things you like. Like any relationship, don’t try and rush it,” he added. “Just continue to reach out for times to hang out, and be OK with them not always saying yes the first time. We’re all busy. I also found it easier to make friends with folks, particularly Swedes, who weren’t from Stockholm (or whatever city you’re living in) as they generally have smaller networks/ open to make new friends in Stockholm.

Several readers expressed sadness that they hadn’t made any Swedish friends and that all their friends were fellow foreigners.

“I made friends through work (international company) and from my country of origin. I don’t have any Swedish friends even though I have been living in Stockholm for 15 years,” said a Colombian reader.

Some readers, however, argued that it isn’t necessarily strange, or a negative, that foreigners end up with foreigners, as you share similar experiences. Having a community with people you feel close to and have something in common with matters more than who they are.

“Close friendships are built because you share some experiences in life. I was an immigrant in Sweden, hence like all immigrants in Sweden I faced many issues time after time, for example issues related to visa or bank accounts,” said the Pakistani reader from the start of the article. “It is much easier to connect with people when you share similar issues. Don’t be afraid to talk about your experiences. This helps to bring us closer.”

SHOW COMMENTS