It all started with Daniel Marriere, the mayor of a small village in Normandy called Coulonces.

Fed up with the unusually wet and cool summer, he and his council passed a bylaw stating: “It is hereby ordered that for… the months of August, September and why not October, rain should stop and be replaced by bright sun and a light breeze.”

It’s possible that he might have some trouble enforcing that bylaw, but it got us thinking about the one change we would make to France, given the opportunity.

So we decided to throw open the question to readers of The Local France – the rules were simple; you had unlimited power to legislate over everything – up to and including the weather and other natural phenomena – but you could only change one thing.

Here’s what readers suggested; 

French language

Most readers of The Local (and its authors if we’re being honest) are at various stages of the struggle to learn French, so unsurprisingly a few people suggested some revisions to make the language easier.

Martin Pickford in Strasbourg said: “I only became a French national by taking the citizenship of my French wife after the vote for Brexit in the UK where we lived until 2019. After much study I managed to improve my French enough to pass the tests and became a French citizen at that time and we have been happily living in Strasbourg ever since.

“My French has improved a lot but for the life of me I still cannot work out why the language continues to use masculine and feminine gender for all nouns. There is no rule as to which should be used and I gave up trying when I realised that it was le bœuf and la viande.

“I would stop the use of Le and La immediately.”

READ ALSO The simple trick to allow you to get the gender of French nouns (mostly) right

Plenty of people would doubtless be grateful for such a change, but Janet Keating in Landes really embraced the omnipotence offered.

“Were I to have unlimited power, I would decree that the soil in France absolutely must make you 100 percent fluent in the language simply by walking on it,” she said.

Paperwork 

French bureaucracy is notorious so it’s perhaps unsurprising that several people mentioned it with some calling for a total ban.

Krystyna in Francoville was more moderate, suggesting: “Abolish paper forms and have absolutely everything online.”

There’s still some way to go, but French bureaucracy is gradually moving online with processes including visas, residency cards, applying for French citizenship and tax admin now done online.

7 handy shortcuts for French admin

There’s also a host of everyday actions, from booking a train or a doctor’s appointment to getting tickets for the Metro or even the Paris Olympics that are dématérialisé (virtual).

Meanwhile Will in Aude wanted only one thing – a digital nomad visa.

Cleanliness

France is a beautiful country but visitors often remark that the French themselves don’t seem to be that invested in keeping it that way, with littering and fly-tipping a regular occurrence as well as the notorious reluctance of (some) dog owners to pick up after their pets.

Heather, who lives on a canal boat currently heading through northern France, said: “I would have all dog owners pick up after their pets. No ‘land mines’!” and Marie Burns said: “I would make owners of dogs that do not clean up after their pets guilty of a criminal offence subject to a 30 day term of imprisonment.”

Steve in Foutenay-sous-Bois in the greater Paris region added: “Try and be proud of your town, keep it clean!”

Insects

Running with the theme of controlling the natural world, a resident of the Loire Valley called for a Mosquito Abatement law, adding: “Each Mairie would have a department for controlling mosquitoes”.

There is in fact one French town that does have a local bylaw banning mosquitoes – although we’re unsure how many mosquitoes have been prosecuted so far.

Displaying less ambition but more practicality, one Brittany resident suggested: “Use window screens to keep out flies.”

Transport and shopping

Some people were more practical in their suggestions, looking at ways to enhance daily life.

Simon Wookey who has lived in both Paris and Tours suggested: “Expand the TGV network and bring a lot more public transit to smaller cities like Tours – more trams and Metros – and more frequent regional rail for rural communities.”

This is in fact the demand of many residents of small towns and rural areas, with poor public services outside of the cities cited as a major factor in voting at election time.

Keith Jackson suggested: “Make it easier for shops to open on a Sunday, if they want to.”

While Neil Munro said: “Restaurants and bars to be open at least 6 days a week from 11am to 2pm and 6pm to 10pm all year” – while customers might appreciate his suggestion it’s unlikely that bar and restaurant staff would feel that this one improved their lives.

And Johnny Baldry said: “I’d make it possible to buy paracetamol in supermarkets instead of having to queue for 20 minutes in the pharmacy – but I realise that even with unlimited power this may not be achievable.”

Overseas aid

A British visitor signing themselves only as EH had a slightly leftfield suggestion: “I would send 50 percent of all their road repair teams to Britain, leading to immeasurably improved sentiments and gratitude by the British towards the French!”

The winner

But if the opportunity arose, we think that Janet Keating should be declared the all-powerful deity of France and we look forward to achieving French fluency under her regime.

Many thanks to everyone who sent us suggestions, the above are just a sample of the many good ideas that we received. Feel free to add your thoughts in the comments section below.