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LANGUAGE AND CULTURE

Why ‘cojones’ (testicles) is the most versatile word in Spanish

The Spanish word with the most derivative meanings is apparently 'cojones', slang for testicles. Here are 22 hilarious examples reflecting how versatile it is in colloquial speech in Spain.

Why 'cojones' (testicles) is the most versatile word in Spanish
The word 'cojones' can be used in endless ways in Spain. Photo: Darko Djurin/Pixabay

Cojones, from the Latin word coleo (meaning a leather bag), is a noun that certainly makes it into conversations in Spain very often.

It’s one of several Spanish slang words for testículos (testicles), a list which also includes huevos (eggs), pelotas (balls) or bolas (bowls). 

But cojones reigns supreme in Castilian Spanish, not least because, just like just like the F-word can be used in all manner of ways in English, cojones can be transformed into different nouns, verbs, adjectives, adverbs, idioms and interjections.

It can imply something positive or negative, surprise or anger, even the number of cojones can transform the meaning completely!

Un cojón: A way of saying something is expensive (literally – one ball)

Example: Vale un cojón. It costs an arm and a leg.

Dos cojones: An exclamation to imply bravery and bravado (literally – two balls)

Example: ¡Con dos cojones! Get stuck in!/You can do it!

Tres cojones: A way of showing disdain (literally – three balls)

Example: ¡Me importa tres cojones! I couldn’t give a damn!

Tener cojones: To be brave (literally – to have balls)

Example: Tiene los cojones bien cuadrados. He’s very brave.

No tener cojones: To be a coward (literally – to not have balls)

Example: No tienes los cojones de pegarme. You don’t have the balls to hit me.

Poner los cojones encima de la mesa: idiom for ‘to show who’s boss’ (literally – to put your balls on the table)

Example: Puso los cojones encima de la mesa. He showed them who’s in charge.

Tocar los cojones: To annoy or be annoyed by someone (literally – to touch balls)

Example: ¡No me toques los cojones, pesado! Don’t bother me, you bore!

Tocarse los cojones: To be lazy (literally – to touch one’s balls)

Example: Deja de tocarte los cojones y trabaja. Stop lazing about and work.

¡Tócate los cojones!: Exclamation to imply frustration (literally – ¡Touch your balls!)

Example: Se ha pirado. ¡Tócate los cojones! He’s left, for fuck sake!

¡Cojones! Interjection to express surprise or anger

Example: ¡Qué me dejes en paz, cojones! Leave me alone, for fuck sake!

¡Manda cojones!: Another interjection to express surprise (literally – send balls!)

Example: ¡Manda cojones! Bloody hell!

Acojonante: Adjective for ‘incredible’, ‘shocking’ or ‘frightening’ 

Example: ¡Fue una experiencia acojonante! It was an incredible experience!

Acojonado: Adjective for ‘scared’

Example: ¡Estoy acojonado! I’m very scared!

Acojonar: Verb for ‘to scare’

Example: ¡Deja de acojonarme! Stop scaring me!

Cojonudo: Adjective for ‘fantastic’, ‘great’

Example: Es un tío cojonudo. He’s a great guy.

Descojonarse: Verb for ‘to laugh out loud’

Example: No puedo dejar de descojonarme. I can’t stop laughing. 

De cojones: Bloody well or bloody (literally – of balls)

Examples: 

Me salió de cojones. It went bloody great.

Hace un calor de cojones. It’s bloody hot. 

Por cojones: Definitely, without a doubt (literally – by balls)

Voy a aprobar por cojones – I’m definitely going to pass, even if it’s the last thing I do.

Hasta los cojones: Fed up (literally – up to my balls)

Example: Estoy hasta los cojones de ti. I’ve had it up to here with you.

Tener los cojones de corbata: Expression to imply one is scared (literally – to wear your balls as a tie)

Example: Llevaba los cojones de corbata cuando la vió. He was scared out of his mind when he saw her.

Cojones morados: To be cold (literally – purple balls)

Example: Tengo los cojones morados del frío que hace. My balls are frozen, it’s that cold.

No me sale de los cojones: To not want to bloody do something (literally – to not come out of the balls)

Example: No me sale de los cojones ayudarte. I don’t want to bloody help you.

READ ALSO: ¡Joder! An expert guide to correctly using the F-word in Spanish

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SPANISH WORD OF THE DAY

Spanish Words of the Day: Top Manta

If you've spent time in any major Spanish city or tourist spot, you'll have no doubt seen 'top manta' happening.

Spanish Words of the Day: Top Manta

Top manta is a Spanish expression used to refer to the illegal sale of fake and counterfeit goods on bedsheets and blankets in the street.

Known as manteros in Spanish, these street hawkers are usually from sub-Saharan African countries, and they sell fake and copied products such as CDs, DVDs and phone cases, as well as imitation clothes (often football shirts), handbags, watches and shoes.

Selling in this way is illegal in Spain, and the idea behind using bedsheets is that they can quickly wrap up their stuff in a sack (there’s often a string attached) and disappear whenever the police pass through the area.

The phrase is pretty simple: manta means bedsheet, blanket, or throw. Top is the English adjective (as in best), used to refer to the supposed quality of the goods on sale.

Many manteros are undocumented migrants, so street selling is often the only form of income they can find in Spain.

However, that hasn’t stopped a group of migrants in Barcelona forming a clothing collective and launching their own clothing brand ‘Top Manta’ that sells its own brand of shoes with the slogan: ‘True clothes for a fake system.’

READ ALSO: In Spain, migrant-designed trainers kick against system

Top manta is illegal but still a common sight in Spanish city centres. (Photo by GABRIEL BOUYS / AFP)

Though top manta sellers are a familiar sight on streets around Spain, manteros have gained traction in the Spanish media in recent years.

Amadou Diouf, a Senegalese mantero, told El Diario that “a person who dedicates himself to top manta does so because the law on foreigners forces him to do so”, despite the fact that one “arrives in Spain with a desire to work and integrate into society.”

READ ALSO: Spain to debate blanket legalisation of its 500,000 undocumented migrants

If the laws were changed, Diouf said, manteros “would dedicate themselves to their own trade”, and he stressed that he and many others were not street sellers in Senegal or their home countries, but started to do so in Spain because they had no other option.

Top Manta used in the Spanish press.

Some years ago a top manta seller who goes by Lory Money went viral on Spanish social media for his song in which he talks about ‘doing a Santa Claus’ (hago el santa claus) referring to the way street sellers quickly turn their manta into a sack, like Santa Claus, before running away.

Examples of top manta in speech

Aunque el top manta sea ilegal, los que lo dedican a ello lo hacen para sobrevivir (Even though street hawking is illegal, the guys who do it for a living need it to survive).

Creo que la policía ha pillado a algunos de los manteros, (I think they caught some of the street vendors).

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