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These are the biggest culture shocks for foreigners coming to Denmark

We asked The Local's readers in Denmark what culture shocks they have experienced when moving here from abroad. The answers we received were partly unsurprising, but others upended stereotypes about Danes and Denmark.

Published: 2 May 2023 17:38 CEST

These are the biggest culture shocks for foreigners coming to Denmark

Denmark's winters can be hard work, even if you come from another cold country. Photo: Ida Marie Odgaard/Ritzau Scanpix

Emotional unavailability

“One of the biggest differences between Denmark and Poland is that you don’t speak about emotions, especially in public,” said Wito, who moved to Funen last year.

It can be easily misunderstood – in Poland I could say to my woman friend, ‘I love you’, and it will be ok, just showing that she is really close to me, that’s it. If I say here, jeg elsker dig, it will be a very serious commitment,” he explained.

“You have to know each other very well to say that, otherwise it probably be a bit too much,” he said.

“The Danes are not as friendly as other cultures” a reader from Ireland wrote, while another said they were “detached” and lacked empathy.

“The social distance” and “how hard it is to befriend Danes” were a culture shock to Chilean reader Salvador, who has lived in Copenhagen for five years.

How hard it is to make Danish friends was mentioned more than anything else by our readers as a culture shock – so much so that we can’t include all comments on it.

“People are very closed off and while they are polite they do not open up to making new friends as they get older,” wrote a reader from Australia.

On the other hand Kelsey, a reader from the US, described Danes as “like the Germans, but with a smile”.

Language skills (or lack of them)

Denmark is generally considered to be a country where the level of English proficiency is very good, but some of our respondents said they were surprised at the lack of English that was spoken, or the reluctance of Danes to do so.

Often, these observations came from people who live outside of cities.

“The high concentration of people who can’t speak English” was a culture shock to one reader from London, who moved to southern Zealand three months ago.

She added that she was also surprised by “how helpful many people are”, however.

A reader from South Africa meanwhile also cited “language barrier” as the biggest culture shock she had met.

The opposite was the case for another reader, Jennifer, who is also from South Africa. She said she had found it very hard to learn Danish, “especially as in Copenhagen, they always switch to English”.

Recycling and food waste

In a culture shock that arguably goes against stereotypes about Denmark, Ellen from Germany said that “food is thrown away as soon as the best by date is reached” and that this was the biggest culture shock she has experienced in her time in Denmark as an exchange student.

“As food waste is a rather negative topic, I would love to add that, compared to Germany, people in Denmark are extremely friendly, welcoming and kind – something I was frequently surprised by as this is much rarer in Germany,” she also said.

Safety and consideration towards children

Culture shocks don’t have to be negative. A reader from Brazil described how safe he feels in Denmark.

“Migrating from Brazil, the overall safety of the Danish society is, still after four years here, a major source of shock,” wrote Rodrigo, who lives in Odense.

“Walking around everywhere, any time without any worry about being mugged is unbelievable,” he said.

“Children are very much taken into account in Denmark,” said Lisa, who moved to Aalborg from Italy three years ago.

“Restaurants offer you crayons and other games, many shops have dedicated play areas, I was at a pub a few hours ago and the owner offered the girls a lollipop, bakeries offer you børneboller [bread rolls for kids, ed.],” she explained.

“Every bar/restaurant has a changing station and shopping malls fancy nursing rooms. There is access for prams everywhere. Adults are much less patronising towards children and treat them with the same respect as other adults,” she said.

Eating

Do you think of Denmark as a nation that loves to eat fish? This is yet another Danish stereotype that appears to be confounded by readers’ descriptions of their culture shocks after moving here.

“For being a country surrounded by a body of water, I am surprised Copenhageners aren’t big on fish!”, wrote Punitha, who moved to Denmark from Malaysia last year.

“I am aware of the abundance of salmon and cod, and the infamous pickled herring but I miss other types of fish,” she elaborated.

The Danish custom, particularly at workplaces, of eating lunch before noon was a culture shock to an Indian reader.

READ ALSO: Why do Danes eat lunch so early?

The darkness and the cold

It’s perhaps not strictly a culture shock, but several respondents said they had been unprepared for how arduous Denmark’s long winters are and how much the darkness affected the locals.

“Weather is another challenge if you`re coming from a country where you have 200 days of sun on average per year, but it is a challenge for all; and you should not let it demotivate you,” said a reader from Turkey who lives in Vejle with his family after moving to Denmark two and a half years ago.

“The winter is hell,” wrote John from Canada – a country that probably beats Denmark hands down when it comes to cold weather.

John also referred to the difficulty in befriending Danes and making small talk as culture shocks. Generally speaking, Danes tend to retreat into their private spheres even more than usual during the winter.

“Long winter. Long songs. Long dinners. Long looks in others eyes. Poor queue etiquette. Inability to apologise,” wrote James from England, who has lived in Denmark for 10 years.

Xenophobia or racism

Several of our respondents said that discrimination was the biggest culture shock they have experienced in Denmark. The responses to our survey make it clear that this topic can’t be ignored.

“How unaccepting Danes could be of non-white foreigners,” was the biggest culture shock for a US national who studied at Copenhagen Business School and has been in Denmark for five years.

Monica, who moved to Denmark from Italy in 2019, named people being “a bit racist” in Denmark as one of her culture shocks.

“I’m American and they usually say we’re bad but I’ve lived in other countries and I’ve never had anyone turn me down for a job because ‘you’re not Danish’. They say it’s illegal here to discriminate and it is….on paperwork. To your face, it’s open season,” said Abi, who comes from Alaska in the US.

Swearing

Danes can come across as potty-mouths if English is your first language, since they tend to sprinkle their speech with swear words loaned from English – which are not seen as being as harsh in Danish.

Mo, a reader from South Asia, said he was shocked that Danes use the “F word (swearing) in professional meetings around many people”.

Birthdays

Many foreigners in Denmark might be used to having a cake to celebrate their birthday, but not having to supply it themselves.

“Baking your own birthday cake and bringing it into the office!” was the biggest culture shock for Anne from the US.

“In American workplaces, other people bring the cake because it is the day everyone else celebrates you – you do not throw your own birthday party, someone else organizes it and you just enjoy it!,” she said.

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'Treat people as individuals': How Denmark could be more inclusive for foreigners

In a recent survey, we asked our readers one question: “What can Denmark do to make the country more inclusive?”

Answers were varied, with some focusing on the social aspect of inclusion, such as making more of an effort to include immigrants in conversations or social gatherings, while others discussed bureaucracy, politics or issues finding work.

Inclusion

“Celebrating holidays from different parts of the world would be great,” said Swati who lives in Copenhagen.

“Melting pot countries like Singapore celebrate Chinese, Malaysian, Christian and Indian holidays,” she noted, allowing people from the different communities to understand each others’ cultures.

“I can’t believe that Denmark doesn’t celebrate Diwali,” she added.

Language

Denmark should “have a TV channel and radio in English, so we can follow the news” said Marcela from Brazil.

Although we at The Local Denmark would like to think we do our bit towards providing such a service, we are nonetheless a written media.

“Language plays a pivotal role in creating closer social connections with Danes. While it is an expat responsibility to learn the language, it would also be nice to have easier access to free or discounted courses, without having a time limit,” said Silvia from Italy with regard to the use of Danish and English at workplaces.

“I couldn’t take advantage of the free courses as I immediately had my kids and focused very much on them and my work, when I felt like I could take in to start studying again, it was too late, the free courses were gone for me,” she said.

Gergő from Hungary called for official documents and websites to be made more available in English, noting that people recruited from abroad by Danish companies might not need the Danish language for any other purposes.

“For example, if my job does not require me to speak Danish, I want to have an English work contract. Or insurance. Whenever I need to sign something, I want it to be in proper English,” he said.

A reader who asked to stay anonymous called for more English to be used by A-kasser, Denmark’s unemployment insurance providers.

“A-kasser… providing their courses and communication in English instead of Danish,” would help inclusivity, she said.

She also suggested language courses be offered for longer.

“Start providing free Danish language courses for more than the first few years someone comes to the country,” she wrote.

Adults who move to Denmark have the right to free Danish lessons for a maximum of five years, depending on their circumstances.

Some readers recognised the importance of Danish for successful integration while also advocating for less pressure to learn it to promote inclusiveness.

“Require less knowledge of the Danish language for citizenship. I appreciate it is an integration tool but I have lived here for six years without any level of Danish. I love the country, the people, the society, I contribute to society and don’t plan to leave, I would be proud to be a Danish citizen but the level of Danish required for citizenship is unnecessary and excludes me from truly feeling like I belong,” an anonymous reader said.

He added that he fully supports all other citizenship requirements.

Discrimination

Suraiya Kasim, a dual national of Pakistan and Denmark, called for more acceptance of people from other cultures and for more openness about meeting strangers.

“Accept the difference, don’t try to assimilate, don’t generalise, treat people as individuals,” she wrote.

“If I look or dress in a certain way doesn’t mean I’m lesser than you – give the benefit of doubt – be more open and don’t be scared to ask and to know the other,” she said.

Hiring and the workplace

A number of the people who responded to our survey used it to raise concerns about the difficulties being recruited or hired as a foreign resident in Denmark.

“It’s okay not to get along with foreigners as long as we are not discriminated [against], especially in job sectors,” an anonymous foreign contributor, who is studying at university in Denmark while also working part-time jobs in logistics wrote.

“I haven’t seen racism in day-to-day life but getting a job seems impossible for a non-tech person like me,” he said.

Ioana from Romania said “accessibility to good jobs” would help inclusiveness.

“Most nice jobs seemed reserved for the Danes while expats with Master’s degrees have to work in burger shops or something similar because finding a job suited to their skills feels impossible sometimes,” she said.

“Being included through work is one of the most important reasons why people stay or not in a foreign country. We need equal opportunities,” she added.

Ideals and culture

“Inclusion and inclusive culture starts in the folkeskole [elementary or primary school, ed.],” said Ada, a reader from the United States who lives in Denmark.

Ada was not the only person to suggest that school structure in Denmark introduces a habit of only accepting people within your immediate peer group.

“Let’s start with no child to have the same teacher for more than three years. Very fixed socialization has lasting effects – find more ways to put flexibility into the school system,” she suggested.

A second reader – also from the US – said children at Danish schools should mix more often with other classes in their own school year, as well kids a grade above and below.

“My daughter is in Danish school, and I have noticed the ‘insulation’ starts young. She and her friends are almost exclusively friends with children in her particular classroom,” he wrote.

“If Denmark maybe didn’t have all the kids stay with each other, exclusively, from 0-6 years with no mixing, maybe Danes would grow up to be a little more inclusive? Just a thought from what I see in my tiny ‘data set’. There seems to be a huge weighting here to having already known a person for years to include them as a friend,” he explained.

We received other suggestions also related to education.

“Educate people about the benefits of being open, honest, with integrity and invest public money on integration and support, especially around employment of foreigners,” wrote Saar Karp Gershon from Israel, who lives in Copenhagen.

Nikita, a student and part time worker in Denmark’s energy sector said “it is not easy for expats to integrate into the society and culture, even though they always try”.

“The locals might wanna give them a chance, hear their stories and be more open,” she said.

Bureaucracy

Nana, a UN international civil servant, said Denmark should “invest in a more global mobile payment system.”

“I can’t use MobilePay [payment app, ed.] here with an admin CPR number and it’s incredibly frustrating. More of us could contribute to the local economy with an inclusive mobile payment system,” she explained.

An admin or administrative CPR number, the type referred to by Nana, is issued to people who, for example, work in Denmark but don’t have a permanent residential address in the country.

Many readers cited Denmark’s strict rules and complex systems related to work and residency permits, permanent residency and other rights made it harder for them to feel included as part of society.

“Remove some of the hurdles for foreigners waiting for residency,” an anonymous reader wrote.

“I wasn’t even able to buy a Rejsekort [public transport pre-pay card, ed.] because I didn’t have a [digital] ID, bank account or CPR number. My Danish spouse had to purchase them for me,” she said.

“Give temporary work permissions and access while waiting for the extremely lengthy immigration process,” she urged.

These hurdles “played a big factor in us moving [back] to the US. I understand the conservative nature of immigration but for spouses, there should be concessions,” she added.

Many people responded to The Local’s survey about how Denmark could become more inclusive. We weren’t able to include every single comment, but we did our best to select a representative sample. We’d love to hear your thoughts too – please join the conversation in the comments below.

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