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GERMAN WORD OF THE DAY

German word of the day: Schlau

If you want to point out a rather two-sided character trait in a friend or foe, this German word could be exactly what you're looking for.

German word of the day
Photo: Annie Spratt/Unsplash/Nicolas Raymond

Why do I need to know this word?

Schlau is not just an easy word to remember, it’s also a fun adjective that you may come across anywhere from children’s books to casual conversation. 

What does it mean?

If you think it sounds a bit like an English word you know, you’re probably right. Schlau is very similar to the word sly, and has incredibly similar connotations.

Essentially, it means clever or cunning – but it often has undertones of being a little bit conniving or calculating. In other words, someone who is schlau is generally using their intelligence to benefit themselves – and possibly also to deceive people.

If you want to impress your friends with your use of German idioms, then it’s worth remembering that the animal most associated with being schlau is the wily fox. For that reason, the moniker Schlaufuchs is often bandied around when people want to talk about the smart aleck in their family or social circle.

Incidentally, Schlaukopf (or clever head) can also do the trick – and, let’s be honest, the analogy makes a lot more sense than the English equivalent of ‘smartypants’.

Where does it come from?

The word schlau dates all the way back to Old Norse and likely relates to the word schlagen, meaning to slay or to hit. It entered into common usage in German in the 16th and 17th centuries with words like Slūhörer (eavesdropper or secret listener) and slūha, a verb meaning ‘to sneak’.

Since the 18th century, it’s been used much as it is today: to describe the shrewd folk among us who tend to have a plan – and an answer – for everything. 

Use it like this: 

Er verdient zwar am meisten, aber sie ist definitiv der Schlaukopf in dieser Familie.

He earns the most, but she is definitely the smart one in this family.

Achso, du hast die Tickets vorher im Internet gekauft? Sehr schlau!

Ah, you bought the tickets online in advance? Very smart! 

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GERMAN WORD OF THE DAY

German word of the day: Sitzpinkler

Do you sit down when you pee? If so, this funny German term applies to you. But don’t worry, in this country, you’re not alone.

German word of the day: Sitzpinkler

Der Sitzpinkler, pronounced like this, is a practical and hilarious German compound word that combines sitzen ‘to sit’ and Pinkler ‘pisser’ (from pinkeln ‘to pee’).

The term is typically reserved for men, and male-bodied people, who choose to take a seat when they urinate.

See also Sitzpisser.

Why do I need to know ‘Sitzpinkler’?

This one is perhaps most likely to come up at the pub among men who’ve let the conversation drift toward life’s more grotesque and banal questions: how do you position yourself when you pee?

But Sitzpinkler is also an insult in German. If you mean to call someone a wuss, or imply that they are effeminate and pampered in a derogatory way (with the added sting of a grade-school insult), then you can call them a Sitzpinkler.

By the way, while you’re at it, you may as well call them a Warmduscher (a warm showerer) and a Schattenparker (a shade parker) as well.

Who pees sitting down?

Despite its use as an insult, sitting down to urinate happens to be a very common habit among German men – and there is sufficient data to back this up.

sit down while peeing sign in Germany

“Standing up – wrong. Sitting down – right.” A sign urges guests to sit down to pee in a cafe restroom in Berlin. Photo by Paul Krantz

British data analytics firm YouGov, “conducted a 13-country study on men’s peeing preferences internationally” which confirmed that German men are by far the most likely to be Sitzpinklers.

According to the YouGov poll, 62 percent of German men sit down to pee ‘most times’, with 40 percent saying they sit down to pee ‘every time’. Only 10 percent of German men say they ‘never’ do.

In comparison, men in the US or the UK are largely opposed to the idea, with more than 30 percent of men in each country saying they never sit down, and only about 10 percent sitting each time.

Incidentally, perhaps the wildest finding of the above poll is that four to six percent of men in each country ‘don’t know’ if they sit or stand when they pee. Perhaps this partially explains the state of public restrooms.

A brief defence of thrown sitters

Coming from the US myself, I can confirm that the idea to make a practice of sitting for a pee at home never really occurred to me until I came to Germany. 

I had moved into a shared flat, and on the topic of house cleaning duties, a German suggested that if we all sat down on the toilet, it would generally stay cleaner. I didn’t resist – I’ll try anything once – and now I’ve joined team Sitpinkler.

I’ve admitted as much to friends from the US and received raised eyebrows, but logically I just can’t condone misting my bathroom floor with urine when I know how easily avoidable it is.

Additionally, there is some research that seating peeing may actually be better for men with prostate and bladder health issues.

But to each their own, I guess. 

By the way, stand-up guys need not worry too much. While Germany may be a nation of seated tinklers, the country’s courts have previously ruled in defence of the right to stand up and pee in your own home.

 

Use it like this:

Bist du ein Sitzpinkler?

Are you a sit-down pisser?

Du hast Angst!? Sei nicht so ein Sitzpinkler.

You’re scared!? Don’t be such a wimp.

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