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MOTHERS

Why some single mums feel ‘invisible’ in Germany’s coronavirus crisis

Germany's huge coronavirus rescue packages have won praise at home and abroad. But for divorced caterer Lulu Pototschnik the financial aid remains tantalisingly out of reach -- and she's not the only single mum slipping through the cracks.

Why some single mums feel 'invisible' in Germany's coronavirus crisis
A single mom with her two children in Prötzel, Brandenburg. Photo: DPA

“My daughter and I have always coped. But now it's as if my life is getting off track. I feel more invisible by the day,” Pototschnik told AFP.

For over a decade, the 51-year-old has run a small business doing backstage catering at concerts and festivals.

But when the pandemic swept through Germany in March, all her bookings for the rest of the year were cancelled.

Pototschnik applied for the government's “immediate assistance” and promptly received €9,000 in her bank account.

But it's been of little use.

Under the scheme's rules, the cash can only go towards fixed business expenses, which Pototschnik hardly has.

“What good is money you're not allowed to spend?” she asked.

With no partner to share the burden, Pototschnik has been burning through her savings to cover her monthly living costs of around €2,200, including private health insurance and rent on the house she shares with her 21-year-old daughter in the western city of Essen.

Pototschnik, who used to cater for the likes of Tote Hosen, holds up a catering book which hasn't gone to use in months. Photo: AFP/Ina Fassbender

In the northern town of Glueckstadt, single mum Patricia Schönfeld is also struggling.

Having just rejoined the workforce this year after separating from her husband, the 47-year-old was still on probation as a category manager in purchasing when the pandemic shut schools, keeping her seven-year-old daughter home.

Juggling conference calls with full-time childcare was “extremely challenging”, and Schönfeld was let go in April.

'Poverty trap'

Germany counts around 1.5 million single-parent households with children under 18, overwhelmingly headed by women.

A recent Forsa survey commissioned by the government found that single mothers have been uniquely impacted by the pandemic.

READ ALSO: Nine in ten single parents can't survive on German minimum wage alone

Thirty percent of single mums in salaried employment have had to take leave for lack of childcare, compared with 19 percent of other parents. They are also more likely to have stopped working altogether.

Of the single mums who are self-employed, just 15 percent have been able to continue working as normal.

The North Rhine-Westphalia branch of the VAMV, an association for single parents, said Chancellor Angela Merkel's government should offer more targeted and longer-term aid to prevent single mums from “falling into the poverty trap”.

Wary employers

Schönfeld still considers herself lucky, saying she and her child “are getting by” with her savings and the maintenance her ex has been ordered to pay until their divorce is finalised.

She is hunting for a job, “but it's slim pickings,” she said, believing that employers are wary of hiring single parents who may have childcare problems if a second wave of infections hits.

Pototschnik is also looking for work to tide her over until the event industry gets back on its feet.

She has so far unsuccessfully applied to be a postal worker, a driver and a petrol station attendant.

'Not right'

The German government has pledged over a trillion euros in aid to shield companies and citizens in Europe's top economy from the pandemic fallout, including through loans, grants and subsidised shorter-hours programmes.

It has also lowered the hurdles for receiving unemployment benefits and rent assistance.

Archive photo shows a mother and child on the Alster in Hamburg. Photo: DPA

But Schönfeld said she doesn't qualify because she is technically still married and her estranged husband earns a good salary.

Pototschnik hasn't ruled out claiming benefits, but worries the €600 her daughter earns each month in her apprenticeship will be taken into account.

“It's not right for me to live off my daughter. That money is for her future.”

The family ministry told AFP the government was aware of the plight of single parents and had introduced special measures to support them, such as greater tax relief, emergency daycare and partial wage compensation for those unable to work because of school closures.

All families in Germany will also receive a bonus of €300 per child this autumn.

Schönfeld, who asked her daughter's teacher if she could stop printing out assignments in colour to save money, described the bonus as “a joke”.

'Exhausted'

Pototschnik has recently started volunteering, handing out meals to homeless people.

“Sometimes I wonder: will it be me queueing for food next year?”

Schönfeld said more than anything, single parents needed a break from the relentless cycle of running the household, keeping the children happy and worrying about money and the virus.

“Single mums need to make more noise,” she said. “But we're exhausted.”

By Michelle Fitzpatrick

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NAMES

Readers reveal: These are the best bilingual baby names in Spain

Choosing a name for your child is always difficult but it's an extra challenge if you want it to work in more than one language.

Readers reveal: These are the best bilingual baby names in Spain
The Local's readers reveal their favourite bilingual baby names. Photo: RuthBlack/Depositphotos

Parents who decide to bring up their child bilingually in English and Spanish generally want to choose a name that works equally well in both English and Spanish. 

Some people like to choose names that are commonly used in both languages and are not only pronounced the same but have the exact same spelling, names such as Maria, Lucia, Isabel and Olivia for girls and Martin, Oscar, and Bruno for boys.

Then there are the names that are recognisable but either pronounced slightly differently or have a different spelling, such as Sofia/Sophia, Cristina/Christina, Ana/Anna or Paola/Paula for girls.

And for boys, Simon, Gabriel, David or Adrian are all names that are spelled the same but pronounced with a slightly different emphasis. Then there are names such as Hugo, which is spelled the same but sounds very different in both languages: Hewgo in English and Oogoh in Castellano.

Likewise, Isla is having a resurgence in the UK with its silent 's' but will always be pronounced as 'Izla' – the Castellano word for island – when in Spain. 

Typical Spanish names may be easy to pronounce for English-speakers despite not being traditional anglo names.

Names such as Pablo, Diego and Rafael are common enough that they won’t pose a problem, but although the name Jesus is pretty normal in Spain, it will certainly raise a few eyebrows among English speakers.


Photo: AFP

Some names though prove very challenging to Spanish speakers.

Spanish tongues struggle with Craig and Graham and don’t even think about selecting Irish names such as Deirdre or Siobhan.

READ ALSO: 

Kristin Tietz, an American who married a Spaniard, explained their process: “Our approach was to try out names orally (since hubby's a Spaniard) to try to choose names pronounced the same internationally.

“It worked like a charm until they enrolled in school (British), leading to a startling array of odd versions of the name Borja, which Americans and other nationalities seem to find easy to say. Sadly, many of his teachers could not, with “Borgo” one of our faves.”

For Mary Reid, an English teacher in Madrid and her Spanish partner Raul, it was important to have names that could be pronounced easily in both languages.

“We settled on Dani and Oscar for our two boys,” explains Mary, originally from Nottingham.

“I wanted the English grandparents to be able to say their grandsons’ names correctly,” she said.

“The spelling was also important too. Although in the UK I’m constantly having to say that it’s Dani with an “I” not “y”.  And that’s interesting seeing as British names have a big variety of spellings these days.”

Spelling was also top consideration for Tania Garcia Miñan, an English teacher who lives in Galicia with her Spanish husband.

“There are loads of Galician names that we automatically scrapped due to having an x in. Names with a J too were ruled out. I personally didn't want an equivalent, I wanted it to be as easy to pronounce and spell as possible in both languages.”

She chose Lucas for her son.

It was something her parents had also considered when choosing her and her sister’s name as they had moved from their native Galicia to London in the 1980s and brought up their two girls, Deborah and Tania.

“My name is pronounced the same in Spanish and English but I used to get annoyed in England when they spelt Tania with a ‘y’,” she said.

She also said it’s worth checking if that name has a certain stigma in one language.

“Lucas is the name they give Daffy Duck in Spain and the catch phrase is 'hasta luego, Lucas', so we hear that a lot.”

For Londoner Graham Keeley, who now lives near Barcelona with his French partner and their three boys, it was even more of a challenge.

“Most importantly was we wanted names that worked in English and French and that weren’t too weird in Spanish or Catalan,” he explains.

They picked Thomas for the firstborn and Max and Jack for their twin boys, born 18 months later.

“We nailed it with Max, which is pronounced and spelled the same in whatever language we come across,” he admitted. “But the other two are both easy in all four languages although pronounced slightly differently.”

“People pronounce it Tomas (Spanish), Toma (French), or Thomas (English) but we don’t really mind that, and Jack is either Jacques in French or Jack to everyone else,” he said.

“The most important thing was not to have a name that stood out as either being 'too French' or 'too English' or was just  plain unpronounceable in Spanish.

“Having a name like Graham – which no one can pronounce in Spanish – made us acutely aware of the importance of an easy name that wouldn’t single you out,” he said.

When it comes to girls' names, Sofia, Isabel, Lucia and Olivia are among the most popular suggestions but Spanish names such as Alma, Alba and Lola are gaining ground.

“We named my daughter Alba. In Gaelic it means Scotland (I’m Scottish) and works in English and Spanish with the same pronunciation too,” said Eilidh Shankland on The Local Spain's Facebook page.

“Biblical names with the same spelling work perfectly (and the same in Catalan too, don't forget some people need to factor that in too!). Such as David or Daniel,” added Lyn Shepherd.

“My mom was Spanish, dad Dutch and I’m South African living in Spain,” recounts Teresa Leonie Krijger Hoffmann. “My name Teresa works well and so did my brother’s name, Anthony. My sister’s, not so much – Maria de las Mercedes!”

One reader suggested trying it out for a while before registering it.

“I wanted my eldest to have my grandfather's name or a variation of it as his middle name – Donald (not a popular option I know!!),” said Natalie Abbott Tobias. “So to begin with we had just Don. The confusion it caused!! Don Lorenzo Don Tobias? People looked at us like we were simple! Luckily we hadn't registered it at that point.”

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