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How to become an au pair in Germany

It’s not quite as romantic as the Nanny Diaries, nor is it as magical as Mary Poppins. But being an au pair in Germany can be fun, as Emma Anderson finds out.

How to become an au pair in Germany
Photo: DPA

Since moving from San Francisco nine months ago to au pair for two German kids, I’ve gotten to learn a new language, live in another country and work with some of the cutest clients I might ever have. If this sounds like the job for you, here’s what you need to know.

Quick Facts

  • “Au pair” means “equal to” in French and the idea is that you become part of the family, taking on childcare and household duties more like an older sibling.

  • Host families pay for housing, food, health insurance, part of your German lessons as well as at least €260 in pocket money a month (more about this later).

  • Depending on where you come from, au pairs must be no older than 26 for non-EU citizens and no older than 30 for EU and EFTA citizens.

  • You are supposed to know basic German to be an au pair, but proof of enrollment in a German class should suffice to apply for an au pair visa.

  • You are not supposed to work more than six hours per day, 30 hours per week.

How to do it

The first step, of course, is finding a host family and there are different ways to do this.

Au pair agencies help introduce a potential au pair to a family and sometimes ask for an application fee.

There are also websites like Au Pair World and Great Au Pair that function sort of like dating websites.

You create a profile for free, describe what kind of situation you are interested in and the site “matches” you with families that fit. I used a free website, but an agency can be helpful to support you if you aren’t getting along with the family or have visa questions.

I cannot stress enough how important it is to make sure you fit in well with the host family before signing a contract. The kids might not really like you at first, but children warm up to new people faster than adults. It’s the parents that you should focus on. If you don’t get along with them, it can make everything much harder.

“It’s very important to do your research on the family as you have to be able to live with them,” said Berlin au pair Rachel Edler of Bristol, England. “Living with the family can be intense and it can be difficult having to adapt to another family’s politics and the way they do things.”

Family first, money second

Once you find a family, you need to work out a contract.

You will need this to register as a resident, which in turn allows you to do things like get a bank account and apply for an au pair visa if you are a non-EU citizen.

Going over the contract together to agree on terms and expectations is extremely important.

While Germany has rules to regulate au pair contracts, individual situations can vary greatly. I have met people who work nearly full-time and must do a lot of household chores and others who hardly work 20 hours and never lift a finger to clean. Make sure you understand the exact tasks expected of you, when you have scheduled free time and how to handle vacation time.

Many families will want an au pair to live with them, but others will pay for au pairs to have their own apartments.

Au pairs do not get paid hourly, but instead get “pocket money” of at least €260 per month. This seems quite low for the 20 to 30 hours per week au pairs usually work, but host families are supposed to also cover health insurance, most of your meals as well as contribute toward your German lessons.

What to expect that you won’t expect

It’s a lot of work. A lot. Yes, the hours seem great – you can have the whole day to yourself while the kids are in school, but that also means you might have to work later in the evening and on weekends.

Living with the family means you are constantly around the kids and if you don’t set boundaries, the line between “your time” and “work time” can start to blur as the kids begin to knock on your door.

I once had plans to meet with another au pair friend who was supposed to have the weekends off. Before she was about to leave to meet me, the two-year old boy started screaming without stop and she was stuck watching his older sister while the mum took the boy for a walk. We had wait until the boy had calmed down so that we could meet.

The experience can be as exhausting as it is rewarding and not everyone who gives it a shot would recommend it to others.

‘Be prepared to live as an adult child’

“Be prepared to have zero money as an au pair. Be prepared to wake up at the crack of dawn, have awkward breaks during the day, and lose out on social time because parents like to go out at night as well,” said Athina who’s from Phoenix, Arizona, and worked in Berlin as an au pair.

“Be prepared to live as an adult child, under the roof of your employer. Be prepared to be treated both as a child (can’t take care of your own health insurance) and an adult (huge responsibility.)”

The schedule can be hard to pin down. I worked out a plan with my host family when I first started, but things change when kids get sick and one parent unexpectedly has to go out of town. It can make it hard to plan your week, which is why communicating your own personal schedule is important, too. In general you should always communicate with the host family if you think something should be changed or if things aren’t working out as you had agreed.

Another thing I didn’t expect is that you really do become part of the family. As the term suggests, the au pair is meant to be an equal member of the family.

At first you might feel at a loss as to what your role is – what you’re supposed to be doing exactly, who takes over when a child throws a tantrum – and the parents don’t always know either. With time things get easier and together you start to fall into a certain routine. You start to get better at coping with problems and coming up with solutions.

I knew that being an au pair would teach me more about dealing with children, but what I didn’t expect was that it also taught me a lot about myself.

Below are some useful links that have helped me along the way:

A very thorough yet straight forward explanation of German au pair regulations by the Federal Employment Agency (in German)

Au Pair World’s guide for au pairs in Germany

 

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WORKING IN GERMANY

Which Bavaria-based companies regularly hire English speakers?

Bavaria is no doubt a beautiful state with a strong economy, but can be a hard place for non-German speakers to integrate. The Local takes a look at job opportunities in Germany’s southeastern 'Free State.'

Which Bavaria-based companies regularly hire English speakers?

Munich ranks third in German cities with the highest total GDP, behind Berlin and Hamburg, but in terms of GDP per capita, it’s higher than both of them.

It also consistently ranks high, often highest, in terms of average household income.

As of 2023, nine of the 40 companies listed on DAX, Germany’s stock index, were based in Bavaria. Seven of those are based specifically in Munich.

While Frankfurt is commonly known to be Germany’s business capital, Munich can claim the title of Germany’s insurance capital, which is saying something, as Germany is home to some of the largest insurance firms in the world, like Allianz.

Beyond the state’s capital city, a number of international companies are based elsewhere in Bavaria, particularly in the Franken region, near Nuremberg.

Which companies actively hire English speakers?

Bavaria, and Munich in particular, is home to a number of companies at the forefront of international business. But the state is known for its traditional, sometimes conservative, culture, which affects its business culture as well.

Whereas companies embracing English as their primary business language are easy to find in Berlin, the practice is less common in the south. That said, there are some notable exceptions. 

Sportswear giants, Adidas and Puma, both have their headquarters near Nuremberg in Herzogenaurach, and regularly recruit English speaking international talent.

“As an international company, our teams reflect the rich diversity of our consumers and communities,” Jon Greenhalgh, Senior Manager Media Relations for Adidas told The Local. “Fostering a culture of inclusion where we value and leverage differences, ensures that we can authentically engage with our employees and truly connect with our consumers.”

He added that around 40 per cent of Adidas’ Germany-based employees are foreign nationals, from over 100 different countries.

Siemens and BMW rank among Bavaria’s top employers, and are also known to hire their fair share of foreigners.

“In Germany, we recently had around 2,000 open positions,” Konstanze Somborn told The Local on behalf of Siemens AG.

He added that Siemens operates in 190 countries. “That is why we value international teams very much…English as a common language is very usual.”

READ ALSO: ‘Which German companies want to hire foreigners?’

Similarly, BMW hires workers from a variety of backgrounds. 

“Every year, we hire lots of internationals and welcome them to the BMW Group,” Dr. Hans-Peter Ketterl, a press spokesman for BMW Group told The Local. 

But not all of these positions are available to non-German speakers.

Ketterl added that BMW’s working language is German in the country, even though, “English is an indispensable entry requirement as the second corporate language in many areas of the company.”

Check job boards and follow best practices

If it’s your first time applying for jobs in Germany, make sure to change your resume to the German format, even for English positions.

While Germany is home to its own job boards, like Xing, LinkedIn is probably the best place to start. In addition to searching for positions based in your preferred location, you can check relevant groups, like Munich Startups, to broaden your horizons.

The English Jobs in Germany website is also a good resource to start with. 

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